8.25.2006

You Might Live In A Fixer-Upper If...

  • You have had a piece of drywall sitting in your dining room for so long that you forget it is there and assume that it is part of your decorating scheme;
  • You subscribe or watch TOH regularly and can refer to the cast members by their first names;
  • The most exciting thing about your summer vacation is that you have new electrical and have your choice of which fabulous switch or outlet to use (who needs vacations anyways??);
  • You have a playlist on your iPod called "Workin' On The House";
  • When you go to an upscale shopping center you get a headache from all the pristine, perfume laden customers and you long to be back at Lowe's or HD where you actually feel more comfortable now (and this reality is sad and a total 180 from your former, pre fixer-upper self);
  • You consider going up and down the ladder a good form of exercise;
  • Not only is the piece of drywall part of your current decor, so are ladders, hammers, extension cords, drills, etc.;
  • People have stopped asking what you did over the weekend because they now know that the answer is usually: 'Oh, you know, we worked on the house.'
  • You have a thin layer of plaster dust over everything;
  • Due to a current project your microwave is sitting on the kitchen floor and instead of finishing the project asap and returning the microwave to its home, you just use it on the floor;
  • Sipping coffee and reading the latest on houseblogs has become part of your morning routine;
  • You traded in your sport car for a truck;
  • Collecting paint chips and scrutinizing the difference between "soft pumpkin" and "pumpkin cream" have become your new passions;
  • You have accidentally ordered a "sconce" instead of a "scone" at your local Starbucks (yes, I actually did this);
  • Sometimes you lay awake at night thinking about what to write for your next home improvement blog entry.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Great fun entry on the blog. Thanks.
Here are a few more...
- Most of your clothes have paint on them.
- The neighbors/relatives are taking bets on when your going to... 1. do a project 2.finish a project or 3. finish completely. (my neighbors joke w/me that they are taking bets.)

StuccoHouse said...

Too funny. Here I am sipping my coffee and reading houseblogs, like I do every day. I had to step over a sink to get to my office. Yesterday evening I re-noticed quarter round that has been sitting off to the side in my diningroom waiting to be stained for a couple of years.

Marg. said...

Yes, all of thse ring distubingly true (except, in my case, I've always preferred the hardware store and lumberyard to the mall - I blame my parents). I just finished my coffee, and what am I doing?

Reading houseblogs.

Here are my contributions:
- Power tools become more attractive than any other gift, even if you really don't need them.
- You talk about moving into the house that you can't live in yet as if it is a relative on an extended trip who will be back soon.
- your entire family has completely stopped considering anything except house-related gifts appropriate.

Brian said...

Absolutely hilarious. I especially enjoyed the sconce/scone mishap.

carmen said...

anonymous - glad you liked the entry. i had fun thinking of all the sad (but true) realities of living in a fixer-upper!

succohouse - after awhile the construction part of a fixer upper just starts to feel normal. too normal!

marg. - thanks for the contributions! good ones!

brian - isn't that hilarious? i was almost mortified when i did that, but it was just too funny not to share with my fellow housbloggers.

Anonymous said...

- instead of running out to HD or Lowe's you just run down stairs to get it.

- You read HD and know it instantly.

-you help the customer in HD or Lowe's find what they are looking for and then you think to yourself "rookie"

-Tivo has more DIY stuff on it than you could ever watch.

Anonymous said...

My goodness, you had me burst into laughter reading this! Oh, how I can identify with the drywall decor (or in our case kitchen pantry and bathroom built-in doors in the dining room, as well as the nail hole filler among my lotion and toothpaste), the semi-permanent microwave relocations, obsessing over other houseblogs and their progress, and thinking about what to add to your own blog.

I think I need to add things such as "when the Lowe's/HD cashier looks at you funny for checking out for the 3rd time that day".

Fellow houseblogger - www.westendbungalow.com